Balor’s Mega Baalisitic Gall Stones // 2015

Balor’s Mega Baalisitic Gall Stones // 2015

Sea Change // Tulca // G126 // Galway

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St Brendan’s Beacon

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Origin
1966 BC- 600 AD

Composition
The stone is made from limestone. The interior is hollowed out. The beacons light source is provided from an ancient eternal Mercury Lamp.

Provenance
The stone was recovered in 2013 from an archaeological dive on the island of Hy Brasil, off the western sea bead of the Irish coast

Function
The stone was said to function as a beacon. It was paired with a similar device which was placed on the surface of the planet Sirius during the great Dogon Space Travel Mission of 1969 BC. Legend contends that the beacons communicated with each other, that loud barks and howls were heard like thunder throughout the land.

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St Moloch’s Map of Missing Bits

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Origin
15000 BC

Composition
The Map is made from 100% Irish wool. It is believed to originate from the Donegal region

Provenance
Not a lot can be said about the provenance of this map. It is difficult to determine what countries are depicted on it. It is heavily creased suggesting that it saw extensive use. A lot of the map details and references are now lost as a result. The map has undergone extensive spectrum analysis which showed references to Atlantis, Hy-Brasil, Tír na nÓg, Lemuira, Thule, The land of Mu, Rockall and many more.

Function
It is believed that the map is a topological survey of the lands controlled by the Hyperborean .The map was used to navigate around the Atlantean Archipelago for trade proposes.

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Balor’s Visionary Visor

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Origin
11,000 BC

Composition
This ancient looking glass is made from high grade black steel and a silver mirror.
The cross of Baal is made fromed in leather, which previously was used as the outer surface of a hurling sliotar.

Provenance
The cross was found in the automobile of Lory Meagher who was using it as a conventional rear view mirror.

Function
It was believed to protect all those who looked in the glass, from the horrible fate of constantly looking backwards with hindsight.

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The Stone of Density

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Origin
12,000 B.C. – 1,000 A.D.

Composition
Extensive Lab tests and analysis have been conducted, but have proven inconclusive as to its providence and mineral makeup – early approximate results suggest its composition is Schist Rock. There are unidentifiable trace elements some of which suggest electro-magnetic properties, but we will have to wait for further investigations before this can be observed.
The steel elements are made of very high grade steel which is imbedded in the rock. They may have been added at a later date, although there is no sign of incision marks from chiselling and there is a complete absence of binding material such as cement. It’s as if the steel was inserted into soft stone.

Provenance
The Stone of Density forms part of a secret cache of illicit Archaeological items. It was found in a mound on a small farm in Co. Roscommon. The Armed Archaeological Unit, Corps of Engineers believes it is part of an extensive network of Forbidden Archaeology Dumps, scattered throughout the Irish countryside, belonging to rival revival groups; the Real Irish Israelites (R.I.I) and the Continuity Tuatha De Danann (C.T.D.D). There is also substantive evidence to suggest the highly secretive Re-Organisation of Formidable Fomorians (R.O.F.F) have been reactivated and have gone live on an ultra-specular waveform.

Function
It’s not certain what role or function this highly unusual and distinctive object played in the past. It’s similarity to The Stone of Scone can’t go unnoticed, as is evident from the metal ring holes that both objects share, believed to be used to hold poles for the transportation of the stone. They also coincidently share the same approximate dimensions. Speculation has led to multiple theories from opposing parties as to its original usage.
One hypothesis as to its usage, which has historical basis according to the Lebor Gabála Érenn (The Book of the Taking of Ireland), regards the similarity between the two stones to be more than mere coincidence, it contends that if The Stone of Scone is Jacobs Pillow, then The Stone of Density must form another part of Jacobs Boudoir, a hand basin perhaps or a toilette, a jewellery box or a foot spa.
Another Variant of this story suggests that it is The Ark Convent itself, brought to Ireland by Heber the Milesian. Unfortunately this is beyond the scope of this brief outline of the stones history.
Others have suggested that it was used in Royal Ceremonies to test the validity of the potential future King’s or Chieftain’s Pedigrees. All potential candidates had to sit on and deify the stone to verify their noble suitability. If the will of their bowels gave way whilst seated on the stone, they forfeited any claim they had on the title and were considered usurpers. This thesis fits the Oral Folk Tale sometimes known as The Anti-Coronation Stone. The story’s central theme revolved around the power of both positive and negative stone’s sacred energy resulting in the benevolence of the good Ruler.
There is an alternative version of the tale called Cac Aistriú. This story refers to a Druidic pratice, whereby during difficult times the Druids would perform rituals of deviation using faecal matter. It is said that more auspicious times could be phrophetically formed and animated in the faeculence by a skilled practitioner of this obscure form of shape-shifing.
An alternative theory suggests that it was used, like a primitive punch bowl, at ancient banquets. Trace elements found inside the inner chamber of the stone suggest that there was more than mead in the mix. Large quantities of psilocybin residue were identified suggesting that Mushroom Mead was a distinct historical possibility. Could this be the Dagda’s Cauldron, ‘that no company ever went away from it, dissatisfied.’
Another Colourful theory suggests that it was a Leprechaun’s Prison. It was used to keep the wee captive at a safe distance, to extract the whereabouts of his crock of gold by use of starvation. The inner chamber cell could hold one comfortably and two if you were that unlucky, as two Leprechaun’s extortions brought unnecessary dangers and was considered foolhardy to attempt.
Since the 1900’s there had been political rumours that the Stone had resurfaced. Numerous reported sightings were recorded at various political rallies throughout the country. It was in the safe-keeping of a group self-styed as The Fearless Freemen (F.F.), custodians of the stone, protecting it from the reach of the Irish Republican Brotherhood (I.R.B.) and the Jesuits. The F.F planned to use the stone as a key to liberate Ireland from the British Empire and the Robber Barons. The plan was to call for a plebiscite to dictate new government structures. The central policy was posited to be radically superior to that of Westminster, both politically and by Divine Right. Its major condition being , that all future Representatives of the People of Ireland would have to pass a test by sitting on the stone for two minutes, to test their pedigrees and constitution of character, before taking up a position in public office. The plan began to develop momentum, when a Gobán Saor appeared amongst their ranks. Various training camps were set up to teach the recruits to secret arts of stone and numbers. The Planned Brehon Revolution never happened. It was foiled when the I.R.B. infiltrated their ranks, as was their want. The stone was spirited away to an unknown location.

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Mars Rock

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Origin
The Unknown

Composition
It is supposedly composed of Rock found on the Planet Mars. Preliminary test analysis indicated a high level of 3D printing plastic.

Provenance
This rock is part of a sample that was donated to the President Michael D. Higgins on behalf of the Irish State by NASA, in their preparation to take on the mighty radiation of the Van Allen belt in advance of sending people to Mars

Function
The Stone formed the central part of the Public Relations campaign to dupe the populous that Space Travel is real. Let’s hope that the early Lab analysis was unfounded. We don’t want a similar situation to the Moon Rock presented to the Dutch Government, which was later found to petrified wood bark from the Arizona Desert

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Lugh’s Stone

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Origin
50,000 BC – 1666 AD

Composition
The composition of this stone is predominately sandstone. There are also trace elements of DNA in the stone which have remained unidentified as to their source which seems to be an alien mix of fungal and human origin.

Provenance
The stone made an appearance during the great London fire of 1666. It has since been in the official possession of The Remembrencer of The City of London.

Function
Some contend that the stone was used to start the fire. Others that the stone was an ambassador sent by Lugh to save the city that named after him
This story contends the Stone was to prohibit and prevent the enactment of the Cestui que Vie Act 1666, aka The 1666 Black Trust. The fact that it failed means we all issued with a Birth Cert Number and Commercial Slave Number.
It is believed that the stone has been diffused and no longer bears a threat worth considering.

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St Patrick’s Shafting Staff

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Origin
3 AD – 469 AD

Composition
This small wooden fragment of a wood shaft is made from Ewe wood.

Provenance
It was found in the earthen mound that is known as the Mound of the Hostages found in Tara during an exploitative dig by the British Israelites in 1904. It formed part of the central shaft of staff that St Patrick used to beat and convert the Natives with during the Rome Special Forces Tour of Duty in 469AD. Legend contends that it is hewn from the wood that made the True Crosses top Cross bar.

Function
It is said that one belt of the stick would make anybody think twice about nature worshipping again. Legend also contends that if the stick touched any other piece of wood that it could instantly change the molecular composition of the wood into that of, the True Cross of Christ.
It is also said to have the power to alleviate and banish warts.

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Gabon Saors’ Fluoride Free Stone of ill: Bring Your Own Lithium

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Origin
6,000 B.C. – 2011 A.D.

Composition
The stone is made from Limestone which has exceptionally high concentrations of Lithium. Because of this the Stone should never be licked and hand washing is recommended after handling.
The Copper metal piping is most definitely Bronze Age.
The tap elements and connector joints are 18th century corruptions made from Brass.
The water purifier and fluoride filter elements are early 21st century artifices, as are the plastic piping elements.
The Stone is inscribed with ogham lettering down both its frontal flanks. Its incised letters are cut with deep groves which would require a very skilled craftsman. They have also weathered exceptionally well.

Provenance
The carbon dating of the stone gives 10 million years. When we focus on the ogham incision we get a carbon date of 600 B.C. These various anomalies incorporate the Bronze Age, 18th and 21st century technologies. It would be very easy and convenient to conclude that we are dealing with a fake artefact. There are however plenty of similar anecdotes of stones throughout Irish History, which should suggest caution on the reliance of Best Colonial Practice of Historical Presumptions.
It was found one morning in 2011 outside the gates of Leinster House, the seat of the Irish Government. It was not there the day before, so the night is assumed to be the time it appeared. All CCTV feeds recording that area, mysteriously had their footage scrubbed by an unidentified electromagnetic pulse (EMP) that surged the network.
This is not a unique occurrence in the annals of Irish history. There are no written records for the actual initial building of the Round Tower or Cloich-Theach, which academia informs us and the general consensus complies with are the products of the 9th century and were sometimes used by the natives to evade capture, locked inside the most visible landmark available. The Centre of European Education had not reasoned that a horde of Vikings who travelled thousands of miles would be defeated by a wooden door raised 20 feet above ground inside a stone chimney.
There are some records for the founding of early churches on existing sites. The records speak of renovations or repairs to existing buildings but not to the initial construction of the building, or the techniques employed, as the Celts built with mud and wattle. The Gael seemingly could not work stone until the arrival of the Normans in the 11th and 12th century, under a Paypal Bull from Rome. The early records seem to corroborate with the local oral traditions, that the buildings appeared overnight, or rather that they were there before the writer of records got there. The early Christian churches with stone roofs such as Cormac’s Chapel or the multi-built St Lachtain’s Church also suffer from this same misreading, which disallows any possibility of a sophisticated pre-Christian pre-Celtic Society in Ireland. The Architectural style of these early stone monuments, (predominately found in Ireland,) bear similar characteristics to techniques employed in Cyclopean masonry of the 13th century B.C.

Function
The Stone of ill is a random collection of styles and technologies that span centuries and as such is very difficult to decipher where and when it’s from, let alone what it was used for.
Did it start its life as a megalithic Standing Stone? Was it a phallus erected to symbolize the disembodiment of Osiris? Or was it of a more practical technological function, maybe to capture positive charges in the ether to be distributed to the surrounding area as electromagnet wi-fi?
That it has functioned as a holy well is evident from the brass tap. This may only be a modern enhancement or restoration/vandalism of pre-existing plumbing from antiquity. The source of the water is a spring in the centre of the stone, which can be seen on closer inspection at the back of the monument.
It would be fair to assume that the exceptionally high concentration of Lithium found in the Stone of ill indicates that it was part of the fabled Holy Wells of Ireland Network, which was run by the Culdees. The Network functioned as a self-help spa-centre, were anybody could self-medicate in a clean safe environment. The Culdee lost control of the Wells when they were driven from power in the 11th and 12th century. The network of wells then came under the direct control and stewardship of Rome who immediately restructured and monetised the network of wells and began a process of watering down the water with fluoride. This course of social engendering was deployed to stupefy the natives into being subjects, compliant and forgetful about their past glories.
The ogham lettering has caused some controversy in the Academic world which holds the view that it is illegible nonsense due to weathering, vandalism or by far the most outlandish hypothesis that it is the handiwork of a dislexic Mason.
Needless to say there are the usual conspiracy theorists who like to wade in with references to Enki and Nimrod and the Vedas, who contend that the script is decipherable. The claim is that it contains lines that can be found in Captain Moonlight seminal album of 2009; Agroculture part 1. The contention is that that the lines are contained in the lyrics of the song; Dirty Cunts. There was a major objection to this thesis as not all the Political Parties which are referred to in the song existed at the time of the Stones reappearance. The Stone had as correctly emitted the Progressive Democrats (P.D.) from the political landscape, but there was also the letters RN inscribed on it. No political party with those abbreviations existed in 2011 when the stone was found. This fact did not fit the theory of a magic mythical stone appearing outside the Dáil, demanding clean un-poisoned water with a carved scar of a curse, denouncing all who reside inside the big house . This, however, was all to change in an act that rocked the foundations of Accepted Archaeology TM. The act that reverberated around the world on the 13th March 2015 was the formation of the new political party Renuna by Lucinda Creighton. Some have conjectured that it is the fulfilment of a prophecy regarding the end times. It is said that Senator John McCain is an avid disciple as well as Barbra Bush.
Some say that if you catch the Stone in the right light that you can see all the ancient Gods of Ireland and their later day replacement Saints formed in long line behind The Stone of ill. They are said to be performing the ancient Brehon legal action of Procedure by Fasting to cut through the bureaucratic tape, by shaming the High Ranking Civil Servants to rebel against their Masters, the Think Tank Middle Management (C.F.R.) and give the island back its clear clean water.
There are currently plans afoot by the Humanitarian Rights Group the Right2 Water, who are the current custodians of the Stone, to door-step all the elected Politicians’ homes with the stone in a bid to liberate their third eye. Balor would be happy.

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Stone of Cern

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Origion
20,000 BC – 2015

Composition
The Rock is made from Marble with micro particles of emerald. It contains high traces levels of Uranium. It contains isotope U that is decay at a fluctuating rate of Half Lives.
The Cup is made from highly tempered steel. It is covered in an enamel coating which has partially flaked off through usage.
The chain is made from pure silver

Provenance
This mythical cup was thought lost in time and was viewed on Gundestrup Cauldron depicting Cernuous, Herne, the Horned One or St. Ciaran (St. Carn). In Oct of 2015 the cup reappeared to the Timeline, when it was found inside the Large Hadron Collider in Cern, Switzerland. It obviously caused considerable damage to the collider whilst travelling at speeds close to light. It may also account for the anomalous Half-Life Behaviour

Function
It most likely was used as a cup to wet the lips. Legend holds that all those that drink from it will be forever strong and fearless and find an inner peace shining within.

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Enki’s Stone of Cloud

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Origin
120,000BC – 2015 Ad

Composition
The cylindrical clouds are made of super-strength Pumice Stone

Provenance
The Pillar clouds were said to criss-cross the sky in Enki’s time. Some of these same cloud trails have made a reappearance as geo engineering Chem-Trails and which have caused some concern in sectors of society.

Function
It was originally conjectured that they were contrails from his ship travelling in the Sky. This theory has lost favour and been replaced with a more sinister one. The new theory contends that the clouds were used to seed the planet with parasitic genetics. It was part of as a vast intergalactic intelligent design programme.

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St Brehon’s Stone of Inertia

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Origin
4,000 B.C. – 2015 A.D.

Composition
The Stone is made of Blast. It also has large veins of highly processed hardened petroleum. There are also large quantities of liquid crystal quartz. Minor trace elements of radium, silica and aluminium can be found.

Provenance
The stone has been in the possession of a Ultra Secret Society (U.S.S.) which is happy to display and showcase some floors of their treasures to the public. However at the same time there is reluctance for full disclosure, at the expense of unwanted exposure. This is an example of such a case and we can only be grateful for the access to marvel at such a priceless treasure.

Function
As with much of ancient rituals in Ireland like the Puck Fair, the tradition of ‘We’re doing it for 2,000 years, We don’t know why, But we’re still doing it’, is alive and well in The Stone of ill. Every 4 years, since time innumerable, creative celebrity defenders of freedom from around the world have gathered together to celebrate the art of art-making. Some of the games involved are very obscure to uninitiated outsiders, who may not be familiar with the various nuisances and slightness that give art its special credence.
St Brehon’s Stone of Inertia forms part of rituals of these U. S.S. Games. The Ceremony bears striking similarities to various aspects of the Arthurian Legends. It is unclear what is being said in the rite, but part of the ritual seems to say that an artist should be allowed free expression with his tools but should never blame them. There is also a ceremony about the base of speech and free utterances. As with all history we can never be certain what factually happened, but we must try and inform ourselves.

Further Reading ………

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